JUST BE THERE - STAY

Our world is a hurting world - its people hurting suffering struggling with so many demons real or imagined. That's us. Oh yes, we try to be strong and brave -- most times succeeding. But at the end of the day in the middle of the night, we cringe under our sheets in our cold beds fearful of the coming dawn.. afraid for what it can do to hurt us again and again.

Scary but real. We all have to wrestle with a myriad of troubles, issues, and challenges, none exempted. We have our troubles and it comes as diverse as pebbles of sand. Some of us have it in manageable terms while others simply cruise down the bumps with undeniable ease. A good number battle it out with fangs and claws as would a female tiger when her brood is imperiled by an enemy. As some others more would simply sulk away lost and defeated. Problems are like huge great weights resting on our small frail shoulders and can easily crush us forlorn and defeated down to the ground.

At this broken point we desperately look out and up from our troubles for something or someone to take our hand and help us up on our feet again. Lucky if some permanent answers would come along with it thus ending our misery and we get to move on with smiles restored on our faces.

If you know someone like that.. right there where you are, give your hand and help him up. When a friend knocks at your door carrying his cross, let him in and give him rest from his burden. When a colleague comes to your desk with eyes close to tears, drop what you're doing and listen. When you see your mother quietly sitting in a corner forlornly, go to her and give her reason to smile. When your child comes to you with a broken toy in the middle of your reports, hug your child and fix that toy. When the maid asks for a leave to run to her ailing parent, grant it without any moment's hesitation or rebuke. When someone in your neighborhood comes to you for a small loan to buy medicines for her sick child, give even if that money was supposed to be for a nice dress you saw at the mall yesterday.

Small things - yes. But you'll never know how much it means to that person.

Someone kind and gentle said this....

"The next time someone needs you ... just be there. Stay."

INNER PEACE

Have you had this kind of day when everything seems to turn upside down, when every nook and cranny of your day spells doom and gloom? Oh maybe that’s an exaggeration but it does happen. I know because I have had that kind of day or days when nothing seems to work and anything that I try to do falls flat on my face. And I rush here and there frantic to find a solution. It’s crazy. It gets me huffin’ and puffin’ like the big bad wolf in that nursery rhyme but the problems just won’t go away. So it leaves me with frazzled nerves and holding a bucketful of odds and ends that don’t fit. And then I lose my composure, my calm, my peace.

So where do I go from there?

Slow down. That’s what Mom would always tell me. “Slow down, child. Remember Rome wasn’t built in a day.” But I paid no attention. I never really appreciated what that meant. Because I saw slowing down as a big waste on my time. So I plodded on with my usual so-called brilliant maneuvers to sort things out. Don’t we always smugly think that we have all the answers?!! Yet it didn’t work out, things just got more messed up in the rush and flurry maze I got myself into.

That afternoon sitting at my desk I felt the world tumble down on me, felt like everything I did suddenly were falling apart or have already. I pushed my chair away from the desk angry at myself, stood up and walked to the window. Nope, I didn’t find any answers there – not in an empty lifeless street, not on that old man idly standing on the corner seemingly enjoying his cigarette, not on that street dog lazily curled up sleeping on the sidewalk content and uncaring, not in the boring sky with an equally boring spread of boringly white clouds above. In fact, the scene before me seemed to have been frozen in time – no movement, no action, just very still.

Slow down, Mom said.

That empty lifeless street in a few minutes will come alive with people and vehicles passing to and fro going about their day’s usual business. That old man after finishing off his cigarette will probably head back home and carry on with his tasks as father and grandfather of the house. That lazy street dog when he wakes up will resume his barking at anything that catches his fancy or threatens his turf. And that boring sky will change from sunny to gray, from sunrise to sunset and will move all of life along with it.

But they all stood briefly for one moment to simply slow down.

"Never be in a hurry; do everything quietly and in a calm spirit. Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset." --Saint Francis de Sales

PROMISE WHAT YOU CAN - AND DO IT

A promise, they say, is a word or words offered another person which contains a pledge to do something at an appointed time regardless. Promise! I remember an uncle say that when someone promises something to him – correspondingly he pours out to that person a bag of expectations, anticipation, trust, hope, and zeal. A promise he pointed out is a guarantee, an assurance, or a pledge of truth and stands on one’s integrity and honor. Well, don’t we actually lean heavily on such things in our day-to-day lives? Isn’t it part of a two-way human communication traffic built on a desire to keep things moving along? Thus we promise loosely, tightly, falsely, or truthfully just to get things done or undone. Don’t we?

Promising to come back on Tuesday to return the book you borrowed as you know how important it is to its owner to have it back -- and doing it, reflects your concern and thoughtful consideration towards your friend - a sentiment coming from the heart. But on the other hand, your brain may sometimes tell you differently, that …

--you can do it another day as you’re very busy (just when are you ever not busy?!)

--and that it won’t be missed anyway (are you sure of that every time youdelay or put it off?)

--or say to yourself that your friend would understand it if you delay (stretching it again for the __nth time?).

Let’s go over a life scenario or two, real ones (names changed).

“Billy, we’ll go to the carnival on Saturday night…..and ride on your favorite carousel for as long as you want.” ------- a beaming father tells his 5-yr-old kid whose eyes sparkled with glee over the prospect of getting on his favorite carnival ride. Come the promised day, the father stayed at the office till 11pm on overtime work. He forgot about his promise. Do you think that it crossed his mind at all while working at his desk that his child was waiting back home expectant and trusting over a promised ride? Can you imagine the fragile thoughts and feelings of a little child who must have hoped so hard for that promised thrill only to have it crushed just like that?

“Darling, I’ll be away for only a year to work there and save up for our wedding. When I return, you’ll be my Mrs. Jose Rivas.”….… He sweetly promised as he gently wiped away the tears from his sweetheart’s eyes. A year and several months after, a relative who flew in from that same country told her that he was living with a girl with whom he has a son. Distraught and stunned she cried her heart out locked in her own room. The following morning they saw her lifeless body on the bedroom floor with a locket clasped in her cold hand. Inscribed inside were the words ‘Love Forever’, signed Jose.

So tragic how empty or careless promises can shatter a heart or snuff out precious life. A dear close friend once told me this, referring to her suitor --- “I don’t really care what he says, he can promise or not promise the entire world to me; but what he DOES or WON’T DO --- will tell me all I need to know ‘bout him.”

That brings to mind another of my dear uncle’s wise sayings -----

IT IS NOT WHAT YOU PROMISE -- BUT WHAT YOU DO THAT COUNTS.

JUST BELIEVE

What am I saying, am having enough problems believing that myself. It's hardest when the chips are down or when future prospects seem bleak or when doomsayers say that our world is wildly spinning round and close to tottering out of control.

But you know what... I must believe or I will simply go nuts with this wild crazy world of ours. I must believe that there is hope, courage, faith, goodness, compassion, fair play, honesty, love, truth, trust, kindness, integrity, talent, professionalism, justice, and ... believe that people everywhere do really care about our world - mother nature - and of each another.

I will -- believe. Even if prices go skyrocketing high pushed by greed and materialism, I will believe that good people out there will band together and lend their voices to reason and right. Even if justice is misused and mismanaged, I will believe that the rule of law will catch up sooner or later. Even if wrongdoing, cheaters, power, wealth, beauty and fame are idolized out of proportion, I will believe that not everybody adheres to that point of view. Even if politicians manipulate the ignorance and poverty of the small man of the streets, I will believe that a hero will rise and champion the poor and underpriviledged. Even if they say that the good won't survive our world, I will believe that the good will prevail no matter the obstacles placed in its way. Even if friends tell me that I am wasting my time being nice cos people are generally bad, I will believe that people deep inside are basically and truly good. Even if we have our differences, I will believe that we can always find a common ground. Even if my dreams are frustrated and shattered now, I will believe that I can dream again another time. Even if they tell me that I can't be this or that nor do this or that, I will believe that I can be anything I want to be and that everybody has talent and potential. Even if they say that there is no God, I will believe that He is there or better yet right here in my heart.

And even if our world looks bleak and dreary and that the year that passed staggered heavily weighed down by so many troubles... I will believe that this NEW YEAR could be better because many do still care enough to make it better.

A HAPPY PROSPEROUS AND BLESSED NEW YEAR TO YOU ALL!